Hops Manager Found Dead

by Frerin Rockear
Caradhras Courier-Journal
Misty Mountain Hops Baseball
MISTY MTN - It was a stunned Hops owner who met the press today at The Gap of Rohan™ Park at Caradhras to inform them that Hops manager, the renowned orc Smahsh Ehn'Bahsh, had been found dead under mysterious circumstances. "It is with great sorrow that I report the death of Smahsh Ehn'Bahsh, our franchise manager. The local constables are currently investigating the crime-scene, which reputedly was filled with a rank odor. Reports that a foreign object -- possibly a slab of brie cheese -- was lodged in his throat are rippling around the clubhouse with great speed. It is our hope that the perpetrators of this heinous crime will be brought to justice... Caradhras-style."

The most recent in a rash of violent murders, coach Ehn'Bahsh was dearly loved by his team and by the fans. Said 2006 Frodo Rookie Award Winner and Sam Gamgee Batter Award Winner, Hudash Elfprodder, "It was bad enough when other folks was dyin', but coach Smahsh, he was a good orc. I hope they catch the culprit from Bree and hang him high from an ent."

Investigations are still under way. Anyone with information pertaining to this crime is requested to speak with Detective Lobelia Tendertush at the 66th Precinct.

Posted at October 20, 2004 09:25 AM | more from Misty Mountain