Orebearer joins Uruk-hai

DEAD MARSHES - Misil Orebearer signed a $80 million contract with the Dead Marshes Uruk-hai today, joining a strong starting rotation that includes Todo Sandybanks and Nasil Oresplitter. Orebearer, 32, comes from the Numenor Kings, where he was the 5th round draft choice in 2004. He came on strong in his inaugural season in the majors, winning the 2007 Frodo Rookie Award, going 21-2 with a 2.92 ERA and being named to the All-Star team. His lifetime record is 97-43 with a 3.21 ERA and 1,028 strikeouts in 6 seasons.

Dead Marshes owner and manager Loki held a press conference today announcing the team's first free-agent signing of the off-season.

"Misil is clearly one of the premier pitchers in the league," said Loki, "and we knew right away that starting pitching was our top priority looking at free-agents. My strategy has always been to win with speed and pitching, and Misil is going to help us do that. His endurance was a big draw, never less than 194 innings pitched, he'll need that many in a 4-man rotation"

The Uruk-Hai have been at the top of the league in pitching for the past two years thanks to Nasil Oresplitter and Todo Sandybanks, who will return to the rotation once again. The fourth starting spot is still undetermined; it is believed Loki is pursuing yet another marquee free-agent, Bugrim Spinner, but the team has declined comment on any potential offers.

The Uruk-Hai fanbase is reacting very positively the organization's offseason moves so far, after another quick playoff exit.

"I think it's great to see the owner committed to winning, and willing to spend money to see that through," said one fan. However, not all were so complimentary; "Orebearer's great, but this pitching and defense *%&^ is terrible for watching the game. Why would I pay for seats in the outfield if no one is going to hit a homerun? We haven't had one of our guys hit 30 for 5 years now!"

Posted at October 3, 2006 10:01 PM | more from Dead Marshes