Rivendell GM blasts Elimir

via The Rivendell Gazette

RIVENDELL - In reponse to questions about the free-agent signing season, Rivendell GM, Elrohir, today blasted Dunharrow's signing of center fielder, Elramli Elimir, calling him a "money grubbing dwarf who is not fit to wear the Royals uniform."

Speaking to reporters, Elrohir denied rumours of a last-minute push by Rivendell to up their bid to Elimir or to minimize their risk by offering a short-term deal.

"We had a price in our mind that Elimir was worth to us," he said. "His valuation and ours didn't match up. We felt strongly that he could be an important member of a Royals squad that's going to do great things this year, but evidently Elramli had other considerations in mind. I wish him and Dunharrow the best for the upcoming season."

When pressed, though, Elrohir seemed to snap slightly. His polite initial statement was followed by a question from a hooded journalist who appeared quite likely to have horns: "Does your abject failure in pursuit of Elimir make you question your whole offseason strategy?"

Elrohir's eyes darkened as he spun on the reporter.

"I think that would be a gross mischaracterization," he snapped. "The signing of (starting pitcher) Fabur Beardcutter to an SGCBL record $30M/year contract was a big step in the right direction for this franchise. We have a winning attitude here, and anyone who doesn't share in that can go play somewhere else. That money grubbing dwarf can cash his fat check in October, when Beardcutter and Company are cleaving their way through the Shire Conference playoffs. He's not fit to wear the Royals uniform - and you've got to wonder what he thinks he's ever done to command that kind of contract!"

Rivendell public relations personnel then stepped in to stop the interview as Elrohir stormed out of the room. In the wake of his unprofessional barrage, one thing that does seem clear is that Elrohir will stop at nothing to bring winning ways back to Royals Stadium - and anyone standing in his way had better get ready for it.

Posted at October 13, 2006 03:45 PM | more from Dunharrow, more from Rivendell