Category: Minas Morgul

Minas Morgul Pitcher Strikes Out Hitters and Strikes Funny Bones of Teammates

Monday, April 14th, 2042
Relievers usually don’t make a lot of noise in a major league pitching staff, but Durblakh Patronilho is making his mark in the hearts of Slayers’ fans and his teammates.

It started in the spring when he uncorked his big arm for the first time on a SGCBL field. Already, he was confusing hitters and being a completely fearsome and perhaps mildly crazy force on the mound. The few quirks in an otherwise standard delivery, his evil grin on the mound before every pitch, and his natural wildness all added up to intimidate many hitters. The net result was 38 strikeouts in just 18 innings of spring action. This carried forward on Opening Week where he pitched 3 innings and struck out 7 batters. He faced 10 batters, for a 70% strikeout rate to start the year.

Obviously, that won’t last, but it’s clear that he has the making of being a fearsome, and perhaps often seen, presence on the mound for the Slayers. But once he got familiar with the routines of the ball club, another side showed in the locker room…his comedic side. Whether its bad dad jokes, practical jokes, or making dryads cry (presumably in laughter), Patronilho is becoming well known for his joking ways.

“We didn’t know this about him, but this is something we’ve not had in our clubhouse,” G.M. Knuckleball Lover spoke, “It will be interesting to see how the dynamic goes, especially when the grind of the season hits in full force.”

Seems like there’s a little more energy in the Slayers’ camp these days. That alone is a welcome sign to start the season.

Spring Preview: Minas Morgul Slayers

March 10, 2042
The Slayers have made the playoffs the last two years in a row with identical 84-78 records, losing in the Hobbit Series both times. An infusion of young blood coming on board to mix with their stalwart veterans may be just the ticket Minas Morgul needs to push further into the postseason.

The End of an Era
In November, the Dryad face of the franchise, Lilith Blackbark took her final bows, ending a 23-year career that will certainly have her in contention as a first-ballot Hall of Famer. Blackbark played in 2598 games for the Slayers, and she leaves holding the career record for Walks (2189) and the season record for OBP (.5395 in 2023). She is #6 on the list for career OBP (.4354), #9 in Runs Scored (1611), #10 in Hits (2730), and #7 in Stolen Bases (624). Despite injuries that kept her out of the lineup in her final few seasons, her absence leaves a huge hole in the hearts of Slayer fans, one that the team hopes will be filled by Xandra Thornflower.

A pair of relievers with off-the-charts stuff highlight the Slayer pitching staff this season. Alauthshaee Elassidil was a signing from the independent leagues in 2040, and his explosive stuff has seen him collect 117 strikeouts in just 152 innings, averaging 12.8 K per 9 innings. Durblakh Patronilho is a walk-on this year. He possesses a devastating slider and sinker combo that could make him one of the top closers in the league.

The job of closer last year went to Ardaah Elrymbor, who appeared in an astounding 80 games out of the bullpen. Elrymbor saved 34 games last season, and he’s been a mainstay of the Slayer pen.

Youngsters to watch in this electric bullpen include 25-year-old Uzmir Saldona, a lefty with a 4-pitch arsenal that includes a knuckler, and Olthor Bugbearshaker, 25, another lefty with amazing stuff who features a knockout curve and a nasty cutter.

In the starting rotation, there’s a combination of veteran savvy in 7-time all-star, Gwaebrylla Norcross, Boriron Celeoborn and Tobi Headstrong to go along with newcomers like rookie Boreogast Melanson. Melanson, 25, was the 1st pick for the Slayers in the 2035 draft and has been working his way up through the ranks for the last six years.

A notable absence will be 16-game winner, Gorbaduc Bramble, who was traded to Moria in exchange for SS Sascha Musiceye. Bramble’s salary and Musiceye’s golden glove made the trade seem worthwhile to GM Knuckleball Lover, but time will tell.

To replace Lilith Blackbark, who was a Legolas Fielder winner at 1B and 2B, the team turns to Lily Pelham this year. The slick fielding SS may be even better at 2B, and she’ll get her chance at that position in a more full-time role this season.

Taking over Pelham’s spot at SS is the aforementioned Sascha Musiceye. Musiceye is only 25, but in his three seasons with the Miners, he scooped up two Legolas Fielder awards. However, his bat is sorely lacking, and he spent over half of last season at AAA Long Cleve.

At 1B Aragorn Rainhart provides steady defense and adequate, if not overpowering, hitting. While the 3B spot belongs to 25-year-old Yong-Gwan Balahontsev, a talented infielder who can play all the positions and even some outfield.

The hotly anticipated star of the offense will be new CF Xandra Thornflower. At just 19, she’s put on the mantle of Blackbark as the Dryad to watch and taken over as the team’s center fielder. Scouts say that she has a very advanced approach at the plate with outstanding bat-to-ball skills. She grades out as a plus-plus defender with dazzling speed.

Joining Thornflower in the outfield are LF Tigoja Gamamli, 32, a 4-year veteran, and 35-year-old RF Thean Elralinde, who was the 2034 Frodo Rookie winner.

Behind the plate sits, Theoma Dunn, the 2039 Frodo Rookie of the Year, and a power hitting catcher with 20+ HR in each of his first three seasons.

The Slayers have the tools to make a third straight playoff run, but the fans are hoping for more than a Wild Card berth this year. They have tough competition in an MC Troll Division that contains the reigning champion Isengard Raiders, but with their influx of talented youngsters and hardened vets, Minas Morgul should contend for a chance at their 18th pennant.

Minas Morgul Makes Big Splash in Free Agency: Signs RP

Tuesday, December 31st, 2041
The Slayers pulled out all the stops today to announce the signing of reliever Durblakh Patronilho. The 27-year-old is one of the game’s preeminent playmakers and has definitely proven why he was such an attractive signing.

The contract is a 5-year deal worth $40,600,000.

Minas Morgul-Moria Trade: Bramble for Musiceye

Tuesday, November 26th, 2041
The Minas Morgul Slayers announced a deal with the Miners today, sending 28-year-old RHP Gorbaduc Bramble, 25-year-old RHP Agrunk Nosethrower and 21-year-old minor league C Wyndelleu Talesspur to Moria for 24-year-old SS Sascha Musiceye, 19-year-old minor league LHP Elle-Rhonda Balby and 19-year-old minor league SS Grubgush Seki. It had been talked about for the past few weeks and everything came together late last night. All players are expected to be joining their respective clubs shortly.

His career totals show Bramble has 78 victories and 67 defeats with a 3.41 ERA.

To date Musiceye has a .207 career batting average and has totaled 17 home runs.

Celeoborn Finalizes Contract Extension with Minas Morgul

Sunday, October 13th, 2041
Boriron Celeoborn probably doesn’t have his best years ahead of him, but he will surely contribute a lot to the Slayers effort.

Minas Morgul locked him up for an additional 4 years at a rate of $9,125,000 per.

In 39 starts this season Celeoborn has crafted a 13-13 record with a 3.19 ERA.

Dagorlad Takes Hobbit Series in Deciding Game

Monday, October 7th, 2041
Depending on your loyalties, the Hobbit Series was either thrilling or heartbreaking.

The series went down to its final game, with the Dagorlad Disaster and the Minas Morgul Slayers giving their fans plenty of drama. In the end, the Disaster came out on top, winning 4-1 at Dagorlad Memorial Stadium today to take the series 2-1.

“We’re lucky to be going into the Fellowship Series,” said Dagorlad pitcher Gromghash Toothbelly. “If all the series are like this, it’ll definitely be an entertaining postseason.”

Toothbelly earned series MVP honors, hitting for a .636 average, with 2 home runs, 6 RBI and 4 runs scored.

The Dagorlad Disaster will play against the Isengard Raiders in the next round. Isengard had a bye in the Hobbit Series. The Fellowship Series schedule will be announced after the Hobbit Series finishes.

Slayers Clip Disaster 3-2 in Hobbit Series Contest

The Minas Morgul Slayers topped the Dagorlad Disaster by the score of 3-2 and moved into a 1-1 tie in the Hobbit Series today. The largest share of the credit went to player of the game and Minas Morgul starter Boriron Celeoborn, who threw 6 innings of 5-hit ball in the win.

With no one out in the bottom of the first, Merin Tunnelbeater barreled up a fastball from Noisur Farren. The result was a 3-run home run, putting the Slayers in front, 3-1.

“I tried to mix it up, keep them off balance,” said Celeoborn.

Toothbelly, Disaster Wallop Slayers in Game 1 of Hobbit Series

The Dagorlad Disaster powered past the visiting Minas Morgul Slayers, 6-2, in the opener of the Hobbit Series at Dagorlad Memorial Stadium today. Dagorlad shortstop Gromghash Toothbelly went 3-4 with a home run and 2 singles. He drove in 5 runs and scored once, to lead the charge. The Disaster now lead the series 1-0.

Dagorlad grabbed control in the bottom of the sixth. With one out and runners on 1st and 3rd, Joop Nasor delivered a run-scoring single, to make it 3-2 in favor of the Disaster.

“I like our moxie,” said Disaster manager Gameodriel Eoweriand.

Slayers Celebrate Wild Card Win

Monday, September 30th, 2041
They won’t go into the Tolkien Baseball playoffs as odds-on favorites, but the Minas Morgul Slayers still like their chances after capturing a wild card playoff berth.

“We feel good. We obviously wanted to win the Mordor Conference Troll Division, but we still feel we have what it takes to make a run here,” said starting pitcher Boriron Celeoborn. “If we can win this thing, no one’s going to care that we didn’t win the division.”

The club will be vying for its 3rd Tolkien Baseball championship.

Celeoborn Snags MC Top Hurler Trophy

Sunday, September 1st, 2041
As Boriron Celeoborn hoisted up the Mordor Conference Pitcher of the Month trophy for August, rumors have already begun to swirl about whether he will leave Minas Morgul once his contract is up at the end of the season.

Celeoborn put pressure on the Slayers to keep him around by posting a 5-0 record and an ERA of 1.67 over 43 innings last month. He also rolled up 33 strikeouts, increasing his value both to Minas Morgul and to every other team in the league.

His record this year is 11-13 in 32 starts and Celeoborn has a 3.32 ERA.