We came. We saw. We kicked their ass!
Last night’s meeting of Blogaholics Anonymous™ went off without a hitch. Not! But those are the kinds of things that make the experience more memorable.
I am going to try to give you a rundown of the events as I saw them. If they conflict in any way with those of other eyewitnesses, we’ll let you, the jury, decide who’s telling the truth.
We arrived at Downtown Disney a bit early. So, of course, we headed straight for Ghirardelli to breathe the chocolate fumes. And they were handing out free samples…
Next stop, of course, was Once Upon A Toy, where you can get a custom set of Lincoln Logs or Tinker Toys.
We have our priorities straight.
Then, it was on to Rainforest Cafe to meet up with the lords of the blogiverse.
ME: We’re going to meet Jason. He invented Blogrolling.
KIDS: Coooool…. What’s blogrolling?
In truth, I didn’t know what to expect. Until now, these were semi-imaginary people! The great thing about blogs is that you get to know people by reading their printed thoughts (and sometimes seeing their pictures). But I’m not really Solonor. I’m not half as annoying in real life (shut up, Dawn). Would these folks be what I pictured in my warped mind?
Well, we arrived at the entrance to the Rainforest about five minutes before our 8pm reservation. No bloggers. It was frickin’ freezing (shut up, Bruce), so the family went into the gift shop to warm up. Then, I went back outside to go to the reservation station to see if anyone had checked in. And there they were, big as life.
ME: Ooh, this looks like a rowdy bunch.
THEM: *nervous laughter* Who is this creep?
ME: Um, I guess that’s what I get for not putting a picture on my blog.
THEM: Oh, THAT creep!
A hearty round of introductions ensued, then came THE WAIT.™ You see, apparently, reservations for 8pm at Rainforest Cafe mean you’re not planning on eating anything until 10pm… and that’s assuming you have Yvonne with a machete leading the way in…
Here’s a few clues to how long we waited outside:
- The girls had time to go shopping.
- Emily’s bare toes (in her cast) turned blue.
- Andrea had time to get lost and find us before we went in…
Finally, after several discussions about beating up another party for their spot and Yvonne putting some heavy moves on the reservation dude, they called our number… if we wanted to sit outside! So, we waited some more.
The good part was that we got to spend a bit of time talking to Dan. He and Venita got to talk book store lingo, while Kier put the moves on my daughter and Molly launched several unsuccessful escape attempts. Dan is cool. He’s one of those “I liked him as soon as I met him” guys.
Eventually, we made it into line for a table–which we STILL wouldn’t have gotten, if Yvonne hadn’t bullied them into not giving it away while we stood there! And, at last, we were seated… at separate tables.
See, I don’t think the folks at Disney knew the Princess of the Blogiverse was coming. They found out in a hurry. I actually felt sorry for the poor guys.
ROBYN: It’s my 30th birthday, and I want to sit with my fucking friends!
LACKEY: Don’t yell at me. I don’t have to take this…
ROBYN: Oh yes you do! Find me your fucking manager, then!
LACKEY: (to manager) Would you like to talk to this?
ROBYN: It’s my birthday, and you made me and my friends wait outside in the fucking cold for over an hour and now you’re not even letting us sit together?
STOOGE: I’m sorry, ma’am, but there’s nothing I can do. We can’t handle parties this large.
ROBYN: Then why the fuck didn’t you tell me that when I made this fucking reservation two fucking weeks ago?
STOOGE: Oh, look! I’ve got a couple of tables we can put together right over here…
Well, suffice it to say, we got to sit at the same table. It wasn’t great for talking (especially sitting right under the annoying animatronic gorilla that kept going nuts every five minutes–NO MORE MONKEYS!), but we were together at least. And we got the most tolerant of waiters in Wendel. Best. Waiter. Ever.
Then, of course, the cameras came out. I’m sure we’ll see lotsa pics on their blogs. I gotta gets me one a them things.
Emily, Venita and I got to sit and have a nice conversation with Andrea. Let me completely ruin her warblogging reputation and tell you that she’s a sweetie. No fire and brimstone shooting out of her eyes or anything.
Paul, on the other hand, was seated right in the middle of everything. He had the greatest time watching Yvonne get her happy on. There was a bit more rum in her rum and coke than humans should be allowed to drink…
Statia was close enough, so we got a little bit of a chance to talk to her, as well. She put in a bid for a permanent day on the Minion Calendar. And since wKen doesn’t seem to want his…
I hardly got to talk to the Princess, Dick, Jason, or She Who Must Be Obeyed at all. Darn it. But overall, it turned out to be a great time with great people. I wish I’d had more time to talk to everyone, but at least I know their not just hallucinations anymore!
And, yes, The-Blogger-Formerly-Known-As-McSweeny can keep is Overlord status. Anyone who can get kicked out of the Happiest Place on Earth is definitely evil enough.
Update: Robyn’s got a few pictures up. I’m sure there will be more after they’ve finished up tonight’s debauchery.
My, my sounds like everyone had the time of their lives :> hehe…one question tho…regarding Pepp’s toes….just how cold was it down there last night….I am expecting sweltering night time temps in 3 weeks…no? Oh well…
You’ll be sadly disappointed. It will probably be in the 40’s. Sweltering to you, maybe…
I think Statia definitely deserves Ken’s spot…FEAR THE BOOBIES!!!
Maybe next time we can all go to your Melting Pot…I bet it doesn’t have hooting gorillas. Or not as many anyway. 🙂
it was fun, wasn’t it? and i do know how to get a table, don’t i? might take a few hours… heh. anyway, i hope i didn’t frighten your son while i got my happy on!(that was such a nice way to put it, thank you) haha… it was so nice to meet you all
I bow down to the queen of the god damned universe for her best boobies comment. We’ve met some freaky people in the blogiverse, and you sir, definitely aren’t one of them. It’s a shame that they made it that one side of the table wasn’t able to communicate with the other. But I’m glad I got to meet you guys. We didn’t have Venita and kids running scared???
Whatchu talkin’ ’bout??? I’m darned freaky!
No, it takes a lot stranger stuff than you lot to scare my batch of lunatics. They were all just taking it all in.
The day after the night before
OU football kicks off in 45 minutes and I still can’t focus properly… Whoo boy that was a fun evening last night. Solonor has an excellent summary up at his pad — well at least pre-Pleasure Island and the boys getting kicked out of the Mousey gates….
That’s what I forgot! (Note to self: bring fire and brimstone shooter next time… To think I could have taken out that darn robo-monkey…) I’m always forgetting something!
Will you guys adopt me? I’m missing all the good stuff.
Oh the fucking PAIN!
First let me recount last night’s drink tally: 2 Guiness 1 shot Tequila 1 Double Bacardi 151 and coke (I’m
The only thing that the extra happy yvonnne scared me off of was 151. I am NEVER recommending that to any of my friends.
Hell, Michele, don’t you know you’re part of the family already?
Shrieking primates (Real AND Animatronic)
Elder’s log – Date:1834579872583274…ummm…873937627622685801 (pant) We have seen hell and back… (The people responsible for the above ripoff haven’t been
I wanna play too! 🙂
Lisa, Lisa, Lisa. Has that Colorado snow got to you? Why would you want to come all the way to Florida just to hang out with this bunch of whackos?
Let’s see…. Solonor sez it’s coooolllld down there in Florida. This was Friday night, right? Y’all had to wait, what, 2 hours, to get seated, right? Friday night, correct? Lets see if I can put y’all into persepective about Friday night…
I left work at 6:10 PM on Friday night. In the COLD! I live 31 miles away from work. Now, dear Solonor, you do remember what the road from Bangor to Ellsworth is like, right? The hills in Lucerne, and that particular stretch where you turn off to go to Green Lake? Well, it seems that in THE REAL COLD, tractor trailer trucks don’t negotiate hills and turns very well, and they do silly things like jacknife, completely stopping traffic in both directions. FOR HOURS AND HOURS. It doesn’t usually take me 5 frickin’ hours to drive 31 miles, you see. So I’ll not be apologizing for not feeling sorry for your 2 hour wait to eat in the cold Florida air, whilst I was stuck in that line…. End rant.
Sorry for the bad ‘tude. I’m sure I would have loved to have been at that table, MONKEY or not. I must go and see about this Yvonne person… 151, huh? And Whiny, did she have the 151 on fire? That’s the really scary stuff. Even I, in my most drunken stupor, avoid Flaming 151 shots…
I look forward to seeing the photographic evidence of this festive event. It’ll warm my bones out here in the cold….
Now why do you think I would make a comment about how annoying you are in person??? OK, I would have but you took all the fun out of it. Sounds like a good time was had by all, why wasn’t I invited? And to those of you who may doubt us…it IS frickin’ freezing here, Mr. Bigglesworth!! It’s supposed to get down to 35 degrees tonight! YIKES!!!
She didn’t drink it in shots, Ric. It was a big glass of it.
Hmmmmmmmmmm. No wonder those hot tub shots look soo friendly. 🙂
Now take that as a lesson, young man. See the evils that the demon alcohol will visit upon you!
Did I actually type that? Whoa, amazing how close a bolt of lightning can actually be without actually hitting you! I must be more careful with this blogging stuff. I apologize for the heresy….
Ah yes, flaming 151, try this one, if you dare!
http://www.outofthefryingpan.com/cocktails/flaming.dr.pepper.shtml
It’s not for amatuers!
Comment bump. Sorry, dude! The long URL was screwing things up. Thanks for it, though… I think…
Yeow! Not fer me, I’m afraid. I like to enjoy my alcohol, and occasionally remember it the next morning. That sounds really nasty, and evil. It would be fun watching someone else try it, though… 🙂
You’re dirty, sweet and you’re my girl
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You bloggers aren’t maybe planning to get together in Orlando in the third week of April, are you? 🙂
The man is a mind reader.