Next Time She Should Bury Them

There is something disturbing about coming home and seeing your underwear in the trash.

What does it mean? Was Goodwill closed? Were they that toxic? Did I do something so unspeakably wrong that her only recourse was to toss my shorts? Is she throwing me out one undergarment at a time?

Being the sort of guy who doesn’t like to have such things hanging over his head, I confronted my spouse.

SHE: They were holey.
ME: Well, if they were holy, then how could you treat them so?
SHE: *sigh* Because that’s where they belonged.
ME: What? Next you’ll tell me you burned the Bible!
SHE: Not holy! HOLE. EEEEEE.
ME: Well, are they or aren’t they?
SHE: You have a nice clean stack of underwear on the bed.
ME: Are any of them holy?
SHE: No.
ME: So! Swapping my sacred shorts for unholy underpants.
SHE: I hate you.
ME: I can see that.

This entry was posted in Life, the Universe and Everything. Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to Next Time She Should Bury Them

  1. Zuly says:

    Sounds like a discussion my husband would have with me. *thwap*. I just flicked you, Old Man.

  2. Sunidesus says:

    We’d always tease my dad when he wore his hol(e)y socks to church. Asked him if it made him a better preacher or something.

  3. etherian says:

    If they were out where you could find them, how many of your neighbors saw your sacred boxers before you found them? *shudders*

  4. Random rumblings on a Sunday morning

    Here are some things that you might not have noticed, perhaps because you were actually doing something important…like spending time with your family or finding a cure for cancer: * Laurence Simon discusses the significance of Palestinian Pet Chow. …

  5. sporty says:

    Yeah, thanks for making me picture your underwear. I so didn’t need that this early in the morning.

  6. jr says:

    Worse yet I have visions of them hanging over his head.

  7. Dania says:

    Uhhh…at least she through them out cause they were HOLE EEE..wait, why am I sitting here typing about your underwear? I bet they’re tighty-whities eh? lmao

  8. Carnival of the Vanities: Part One

    The one week I am busy beyond belief is the week I am the host. I thought I would put up the beginning as I work on the rest of the listing. Have fun! King of Foolspresents the Five Questions…

  9. Carnival of the Vanities: Part One

    The one week I am busy beyond belief is the week I am the host. Here it all is… more than I can handle reading this week that is for sure. Thanks for stopping by! King of Foolspresents the Five…

Comments are closed.