What do ya mean you didn’t even notice that there was a Blackberry outage?
Anyway, for those of you with one of those expensive doohickeys that keep you tethered to your job at all times, here’s a lits of suggestions from the Woot! blog on how to deal with the next one:
- Always keep a spare fiber-optic cable with tin cans attached to each end.
- Take a deep breath, stretch, and count to 20. When you’re relaxed, you can throw your BlackBerry much harder.
- Acquire an advanced degree in telecommunications engineering, so you can decipher the eventual explanation from RIM.
- Call your local Homeland Security office and threaten to blow it up in the name of Holy Jihad. Then the BlackBerry outage will be the least of your worries.
- While they may not be fast, today’s carrier turtles are more reliable than ever.
- Use your writing or photography skills to chronicle the tragedy for future generations. The world must never forget.
- Consider learning semaphore.
- Take advantage of the accompanying chaos to loot an iPhone.
- If you experience feelings of murderous rage, remember: incompetent buck-passing millionaire executives are people, too.