Some idiot put an ad in the paper that said:
Idiots having yard sale in June in Florida. Starting at 8AM. *snicker* Waterbed, refrigerator and other crap available. I doubt they’ll last an hour, so come on by around 10 and offer them a buck for the whole mess.
Since we hadn’t taken the waterbed apart or tried to get the fridge out the door, we decided to get up early. Two hours should be enough time to put a yard sale together, right?
Still sitting on the couch.
HER: Let’s not move all at once.
Finally got up and started tearing down the bed. Decided to get Whiny up just to share our pain.
Interesting side note: We found a 4th grade project Pepperkat did where she was asked to put down one word that described her. She said, “Smart.” The jury will notice that she managed to find a way to spend the weekend at a friend’s house. I think she came up with the right word.
Decided to tell everyone that we already sold the fridge and leave it where it is.
Decide that now might be a good time to put up the yard sale signs.
While writing our address, I forgot how to draw the number 4.
Felt stupid until the missus (who took over the project with a snicker) forgot how to draw a 3.
Felt better until driving around to put out signs I lost my car keys by leaving them on the ground near a sign. Spent 5 minutes searching the car before thinking to go look near the sign.
HER: You should put some sunscreen on.
ME: Nah. I’m just going to sit in the shade all day.
Have 10th customer tell us it’s too damned hot for a yard sale.
Refrain from hitting them with a yard sale sign.
While going through a box of stuff to sort out things, have customer say, “My you’re getting a late start, aren’t you?”
Refrain from hitting them with a naked Ken doll.
Left alone. V has terrible headache. Whiny in hiding.
No problem. I’ll just sit here and look at the clouds. Kinda nice, actually. I haven’t just sat and looked at shapes in the clouds in a long time.
Clouds look like evil monsters that are going to eat me.
Whiny makes me a peanut butter sandwich.
I am chased down by a hornet that wants a bite.
I hate hornets.
1:00 PM to 3:00 PM
I have no memory of this time other than the constant drip, drip, drip of my melting flesh.
Mrs. Rasreth joins me again.
We have taken to shaking our fist and yelling, “Bastaaaaaaaard!” at every car that passes without stopping.
Our new sales technique is not working, but it is fun.
Load all the junk (besides the still unsold waterbed) into 2 cars and take it to Goodwill.
Decide to never EVER buy another material object again.
So, how was your Saturday? And does anyone know a good sunburn remedy?