There’s been some confusion on just who’s whose minion. So, in an effort to clear things up, I am posting this handy, dandy Minion Calendar,™ so you’ll know which dark master you are to serve. m’kay?
Monday
Solonor – Best. Blogger. Ever. (’cause I said so!)
Tuesday
Bill – Best. Pouter. Ever.
Wednesday
Michele (with one ‘L’) – Best. Demon Wench. Ever.
Thursday
Kat – Best. Antichrist. Ever.
Friday
F*cko (sorry, it’s a PG blog) – Best. Do-crap-for-free-for-the-entire-frickin’-blog-world-guy. Ever.
Saturday
wKen – Best. Generous Sex Fiend. Ever.
Sunday
Robyn and/or Dick – Best. Blogging Tag Team. Ever.
Please, be aware of the schedule, and NEVER forget:
1. You may be called to duty as minion to various other lords and ladies of evil on an as-needed basis: wSpaceBran, Scott, Muse, Christine, Christine, Statia, Hoopty, Lisa, Les, Theresa, Promo, Cranky, Annessa, Mordant, Whiny, Pepperkat, or any number of other deities and demi-demons for which I (to my soon to be realized) pain have forgotten.
2. A summoning from Sekimori (mistress of the entire frickin’ world) trumps all scheduled minioning.
Thank you. Happy servitude.
wow. i’ve been scheduled. i’m honored.
Oh great, I get a friday which is when everyone stops blogging. At least I made the list 🙂 So does this mean I gotta give some shit away every friday and blog about it?
No! It means you get to have your minions do your evil bidding. Work with me, here!! 🙂
people to do the antichrists bidding? yessssss baby. *wheels turning, lightbulbs flashing on, ideas are forming. world domination, here i come* muuuhahahahahahaha
You only have ultimate powers on Thursdays, kat. On Monday’s you’re my lackey. Mwahaha, backatcha.
Finally, someone who f*cking GETS IT!!!
hey, i’ll take thursdays. even the great horn headed beast of hell had to start somewhere…lmao
Queen Of The Goddamned Internet World
A summoning from Sekimori (mistress of the entire frickin’ world) trumps all scheduled minioning. Finally, someone who truly understands who is really in charge around here. Solonor, you are exempt
What? I only get a part time lackey? Who do I speak to about this?
Not only that, but we share the lackey?
Hmm.
I knew I’d catch hell for this…
You misunderstand. Those are the SCHEDULED masters of evil. You guys get to call on minions whenever you are in need (subject to the “overruled by Seki” clause).
[To self: Whew! Ya think that’ll work? Maybe it’ll buy ya time to pack yer bags and get outta town, at least…]
I like being the evil overlord on cheap movie day.
“Minion! Buttered popcorn, stat!”
oooo minions! just want i’ve always wanted!
Sunday, bloody Sunday
You know those underwear with the days of the week screen-printed on the hiney(*? Well this is kinda like that, only for blogs. You’ll notice I share lazy Sundays with the one I love. And don’t you forget it. (*Panties optional.)
Do I get to kill boy band members on my allocated day? I need to get some sleep and revisit this after a nights sleep and plan my take over.
Calling All Minions…
Have you got your very own copy of the minion calendar ™ that Solonor has so generously created? No? Well
i don’t have the energy for evil overlording, anyways…….. way too much work, minions or no
Damn, my day was yesterday. Now I have to wait a whole week to take over the world.
What can I do for you today, oh great, evil Kat?
I’m showin’ goods, and I don’t get to have a minion??? That’s just wrong as…. well that’s just wrong. :oP
Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?
Statia! You, of all people, should know the power of minion calling. All non-scheduled minions have greater responsibilities, as they can call out the dogs at will. You musn’t take this power lightly or use it for silly whims.
i have set my request. do. now. bug them as they have bugged me. if nothing else, this task will give you something to blog about later. they are relentless. be prepared to curse at them.
hey, that’s wMe!
*sniff* I’m Solonor’s minion. Mom will be so proud.
But just to let you know, I’ve already given my soul to someone else, and you’ll have to ask if he’ll share.
You’ve got a point there Solonor. This week, Robyn is my minion. She’s dahling. I’m going to marry her someday!
Oh hell. I see my name listed in conjunction with something I haven’t been paying close attention to. Does this mean I am a minion or that I can call upon minions?! Dammit, time to read some archives here and figure out my head from a hole in the ground. 🙂
so, like, at anytime, i can call upon the forces of the minions, if i’ve assumed correctly. i’m not forced to use my minion rations on only one day. right? eggggsellent. >:)
hooray! i’m wEvil!
Does that mean you have bolls?
Bread is upset about not being designated Overlord of an Evil Minion Master Day. When I patiently explained to him that in order to become one he would have to overthrow the current Overlord, he issued the following statement;
Um, excuse me. Bread will be silent. Now.
See, the problem with that strategy, Geeky, is that he’ll only get a couple of days of absolute rule. What I failed to mention (and what the ever-astute wBranAtee has figured out) is that there is a kharmic balance between those who are and those who are not constrained to the schedule. The ad hoc masters are the ones that the Dominion Uber Humanity organization has determined best suited to wielding power with care and aforethought. DUH believes that the seven timetabled demons (STD’s) need to be limited to no more than a single 24-hour period of minion service.
Bottom line:
Scheduled demons = more power
Non-scheduled demons = more brains
Besides, ya think yer gettin’ Bill offa Cheap Movie Night? Nuh-uh.
Excuse me? Are you saying Bread has more brains than me?
Bring it on, Bread. I’ll make croutons out of your sorry, crusted ass.
Hell no! Bread’s not even on the Evil Overlord schedule. Bread is minion all the way.
(Oh, crap. Now I’m gonna catch it from everybody I left off the list…*sigh*…back of the cave with me…)
Bow before your master!
According to the Minion Calendar™ I am your Dark Lord Du Jour! Bow before your MASTER! And will someone get
i’m wAstute!
I love minions
I am a lady of evil and have the right to call upon minions to do my bidding. I am
I’m a whore, wreckin’ joints left and right.
I’m like Hoopty, sleeping on sofa’s except I’m trashing blogs. I’m a whore like that what can I say. But
minion work
per Bill’s Orders, a photo of something in my hand. [er?] although i’m not a minion, as i am
Hey, do I still get to be evil overlord even though I committed Fucko-cide?
Ewww…good point. Do you think you’re still evil enough?
Jason’s pretty damn evil, even if he does wear bunny slippers. Because they’re, um, real bunnies, yeah, that’s it.
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