Solonor's Inkwell

It was more like Fort Worth days and Fort Worth nights, but whatever. I’m back from my little excursion to Fort Worth via Odessa, and I couldn’t be tireder.

On Wednesday, I flew into Midland (via Dallas) to be available for an early morning meeting in Odessa. The sales guy I was paired up with made the arrangements, but he didn’t bother reserving a hotel room. “There’s nothing there,” he said. “It should be easy.”

Naturally, when we arrive there is no room in the inn. (We found a La Quinta with a couple of rooms after a nice wandering tour of the city.)

The next day, after our meeting, we caught a puddle jumper to Dallas. I haven’t been on such a wild ride in a long time (and, remember, I live in theme park land). Holy crap. We were dodging funnel clouds and all manner of nasty weather. I had my “screaming like a little girl” sound effect record cranked.

The rest of the time was pleasant enough, though. We had our annual client conference in a nice hotel near the Texas Motor Speedway. I’m not a golfer, but it was a golf resort, and the scenery was very pretty.

On Friday night, I hooked up with Nefarious (you know… Mr. Jenn). He hauled me around downtown Fort Worth, which was having an art festival. Lots of bands playing and stuff going on. We stopped into the Flying Saucer (pages and pages and pages of beers!!) to have a refreshing beverage, but we sat too close to the band. They started out well enough, playing some Motown kinda stuff, but the minute they launched into a series of KC and the Sunshine Band songs, Nef said, “Drink faster!!”

[Editorial interruption. I told this story at least 4 times, including a shudder of disgust when I mentioned that they started playing “Shake Your Booty”. Every time, instead of a sympathetic groan, I heard “Hey! I like KC and the Sunshine Band.” I obviously hang out with the wrong co-workers.]

We eventually wound up in an old place that had a nice cowboy bar feel to it. He got a burger (which was apparently not as good as someplace called the Angry Dog in Dallas), and we started watching the bar tv while talking about kids and guitars and jobs and our fabulous wives. But all of a sudden the kickboxing or whatever the hell they were showing switched to sumo wrestling. And they kept doing like 15 slow-mo replays of each ultimate wedgie match. (Aaaaaah! My eyes! And how’s that burger taste now, Nef??)

Anyway, a good time was had by all, and I’m sorry Jenn had to stay home with the kids. To make matters worse make up for it, I gave her one of my CD’s.

Well, I’m off to the Lone Star State until Sunday.

While I’m gone, keep the fort secured from attack. Don’t let any aliens across the border. Make sure another blog doesn’t develop any nukes. Uphold the sanctity of marriage. Enjoy your tax cuts and deficits.

(Just practicing my Texas phraseology. Never know when I’ll run into the Prez or something over there.)

Oops! Forgot one: DON’T SHOOT!