I Was Here

Tonight we had dinner with the lovely (and slightly less bitter than usual) Bitter Kat and got to meet the SB (no, there isn’t an “o” in there, quit it). He is equally deserving of the “lovely” moniker, though we wound up trying to decide if he was “perky” or “quirky.” We chose the latter (much to his approval).

After dinner, we scurried over to the theatre (not “theater,” this is a classy joint) to see the SB in his one-man play at the Orlando Theatre Project, called Underneath the Lintel by Glen Berger.

What a wonderful show!

The story is of an eccentric Dutch librarian who recounts his growing obsession with a library book that gets returned more than a hundred years past due. His attempts to track down the culprit lead him all around the world and into his own heart. This is one of those great pieces that manages to be hilariously funny and deeply touching at the same time. And the SB’s performance was fantastic.

If at all possible, we’ll be going back and taking the kids with us.

Posted in Life, the Universe and Everything | Comments Off on I Was Here

Memeries

OK, I’m asking for it after that last bit, but here’s one of those meme things that I can’t resist.

Invent a memory of me and post it in the comments. It can be anything you want, so long as it’s something that’s never happened. Then post this in your journal so that people can invent memories for you. (I consider the last bit optional if you

Posted in Wouldya Lookit That! | 11 Comments

Breathe, stupid, you forgot to breathe again!

I apologize for my last entry. I should always step away from the keyboard and count to 100 before I post anything.

I don’t like to get political here very often. There are enough political blogs in the world, and we don’t need another one. While I love debating, I don’t like fighting in an arena where no one can be convinced that their point-of-view isn’t the Holy Truth™. There is no middle these days, and I’m a left-of-centrist–not far enough left to shun my conservative friends (or to think that they’re always wrong), but far enough that I can’t talk politics with them without pissing them off.

But I let my emotions on the whole Iraqi torture story get bottled up by not posting about it to begin with, by thinking that I could just leave it to everyone else to write about, and I’d get by with baseball and monkeys. The Limbaugh thing just blew the lid off the pressure cooker.

There are thousands of young men and women trying to do the best job possible in a country where people are willing to blow themselves up to kill them, and a few morons just made it a million times worse. Not to mention how much safer it makes us all by reinforcing the stereotype of Americans the terrorists have put in front of the Arab world. Why don’t we just get Disney to whip up some marketing materials for Al Qaeda recruitment while we’re at it?

And here we have a bunch of people–not just the fat blowhard who thinks it’s “not that bad”–who give it the “yeah, but Saddam was worse” routine. It’s not about whose torture was worse! Excuse my Pollyanna vision, but we’re supposed to be the good guys, damn it! We can’t just switch our story from “protecting the world from a madman with nukes” to “liberators of an oppressed people” and then try to wriggle our way out of our transgressions by holding ourselves up to a vile dictator and saying, “hey, at least we aren’t him” or by parsing the difference between “torture” and “abuse.”

Torture is wrong. If you support the use of torture, you are evil.

There. Now, I’ve gotten that out of my system. You may commence flaming, whilst I move back into silly mode. Thank you for your indulgence.

Posted in Rants 'n' Whines | 5 Comments

Why does anyone still listen to this asshole?

I am so fucking pissed right now, I can barely see straight.

Excuse my language, but this big, fat idiot has pushed me over the edge.

I try not to jump to the conclusion that a blogger (especially a gossip columnist type like Wonkette) has not taken a quote out of context. So, I went looking for evidence of the following statement about the torture of Iraqi prisoners:

LIMBAUGH: Exactly. Exactly my point! This is no different than what happens at the Skull and Bones initiation and we’re going to ruin people’s lives over it and we’re going to hamper our military effort, and then we are going to really hammer them because they had a good time. You know, these people are being fired at every day. I’m talking about people having a good time, these people, you ever heard of emotional release? You of heard of need to blow some steam off?

I found it. You can hear the audio of the moron at Media Matters for America.

Somehow actually hearing him chuckle his way through a comparison of prison torture to a fraternity prank pissed me off way more than reading it.

I have to stay off the Internet until my blood pressure comes down.

Posted in Rants 'n' Whines | 15 Comments

All Your Base Are Belong To Spidey

Fay Vincent thinks it’s “inevitable but sad.”

Ralph Nader says we have to revolt.

Gary Ruskin of Commercial Alert wants us to boycott Sony “for the children.”

And Sgt. Grump says, “ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!”

But is it really all that bad? Have we reached the nadir of civilization just because ads for Spider-Man 2 will appear on bases?

Why is it that when ads are plastered all over everything today it’s “evil commercialism,” but when you see pictures of the walls of Ebbets Field or the Baker Bowl it’s “historic” or “quaint”? The “holy shrine of Ruth,” Yankee Stadium, has always had billboards in the outfield, just like every other major and minor league park. Hell, the Green Monster was just a big patchwork of ads until 1947. And was anyone deeply offended by the ads on the players’ uniforms when the Yankees and Devil Rays opened the season in Japan? (I know, some of you were deeply offended that Opening Day was in Japan to begin with, but that’s a different matter.)

I’m more inclined to agree with Dusty Baker: “You’ve still got to touch base, whether they got spiders, scorpions or snakes on them.”

Today’s over-the-top commercialism is tomorrow’s Americana.

Check out the vintage advertising for more evidence that we’ve never really been ad free.

Posted in Baseball | 5 Comments

Forgive me my faithlessness

Hail Yastrzemski
full of grace,
the Monstah is with you.

Blessed are you among Sox fans
and blessed is the fruit of your triple crown.

Holy Yaz, father of Sox,
pray for us sinners
now and at the hour of our death.

There. That oughta help.

Posted in Baseball | 4 Comments

Gracias, Mexico!

Buzz reminds us that today is Cinco de Mayo. But what is it, besides an excuse for ad agencies to sell more Corona? And why the hell should Americans celebrate this Mexican holiday?

It’s because they may have just saved the Union’s ass in the Civil War, that’s why!

In 1862, England, Spain and France sent forces to Mexico to collect debts. The French wanted more than that, though. They wanted to stick around. So, they sent their forces toward Mexico City to install Maximilian of Austria as ruler. On May 5, at Puebla (100 miles east of Mexico City), an outnumbered force of Mexican soldiers and farmers handed the French army their first defeat in 50 years.

Why do we care?

France hated Lincoln and the U.S. If they had won, they would have supported the South in the Civil War and would have used Mexico to supply the Confederates. In fact, the French sent a larger force after the defeat at Puebla and managed to put Maximilian in Mexico City the next year. But the president of Mexico, Benito Juarez, fled north and with the help of Californian and Texan citizens, he managed to hold off the French until the U.S. was reunited. The U.S. then helped Juarez toss out Maximilian.

For the rest of the story, see: Cinco de Mayo History and Cinco de Mayo, the Real Story

Hey! Who the hell let Paul Harvey in here?

Posted in Wouldya Lookit That! | 3 Comments

They don’t call it the Cy Young Award for nothing

Today is the 100th anniversary of Denton True “Cy” Young pitching the
first Perfect Game in American League history. Young pitched 8 hitless innings in 2 games prior to this and 6 more in the next game… a total of 24 1/3 hitless innings… 76 batters without a hit! The scoreless streak stretched to 45 innings – a record that held until Don Drysdale got 58 in 1968. (Orel Hershiser got 59 in 1988.) On top of that, he struck out 349 that year, which was the Major League record broken by Sandy Koufax (382) in 1965.

I know the real cure for The Curse™. The Sox need to change their name back to the Boston Pilgrims.

[ Thanks to Cableman for reminding me of this. ]

Posted in Baseball | 1 Comment

Death Star Rebuilt In Record Time

Oakland has failed us.

Gah. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to stare at the RED ALERT VADER until June.

It’s going to be a long summer.

Posted in Baseball | 4 Comments

Where’s Joe Camel when you need him?

Flavored Asian Cigarettes are Extra Harmful

Mmmmm… *cough*… cherry… *hack*…

Posted in Rants 'n' Whines | 1 Comment