Solonor's Inkwell

This is just for the Floridians out there. The rest of y’all just go off to the pout-a-thon. I’ll catch up soon.

According to how I voted today I am:

1. In favor of allowing people to smoke in the next cubicle.
2. Against allowing people to build an add-on to the house for Grandma.
3. Opposed to voluntary pre-kindergarten education.
4. In favor of huge classes and overworked teachers.
5. A flagrant torturer of pregnant pigs.

Why in frickin’ Hades’ undergarments do we have to do everything ourselves? Do we not have a legislature in Tallahassee? Are they not supposed to deal with things like banning smoking and allocating funds for classrooms and preventing cruelty to pregnant pigs?

So what the hell am I doing wasting my precious pouting time trying to decide whether I have to:

A. Look like a schmuck (sorry Bruce) and an animal hater for voting against a measure that would prevent inhumane confinement of pregnant pigs (Amendment 10)

OR

B. Add language to our state constitution that involves “gestation cases” and pregnant pigs!

Out of the 11 Amendments today, only 4 of them should even be considered for addition to the constitution. In fact, the League of Women Voters of Florida opposes all the others, because “the Constitution should be a simple, integrated statement of basic law free from statutory detail.”

In other words, get off your lazy asses in Tallahassee and make laws about these things yourselves, morons! (I added the moron bit…)

Don’t force me to look like I said, “No, I don’t think we should have a voluntary pre-K program in Florida,” when I really mean: “Come up with one without cluttering up the constitution…morons.” (Couldn’t resist.)