Solonor's Inkwell

In spite of my plea and the best efforts of the Monroe County Board of Elections (or at least one trustworthy polling place), somebody decided that they needed to vote for the terrorists to win so fricking badly that they needed to get out of their nice, warm bed, putt-putt down to the local polling place, and make a scene.

Look. If people in wheelchairs were meant to vote, then God would have given them telekinetic powers or something. Geez.

(Well, at least that trumps your whiny cries about how you don’t vote because it takes too much effort.)

Hey, if you could do me a favor and not vote on Tuesday that would be great.

If you don’t vote, then my vote counts that much more!! And, really, wouldn’t you rather have me decide the fate of the country through my elected representatives than muddying things up with your own choices?

So, please, if you haven’t already done so by getting an absentee ballot or by going out to an early voting location, then don’t mess it up for me by voting tomorrow. The lines are going to be long, and your vote really doesn’t mean anything anyway. If you had voted last time, then all you’d have to show for it is the right to complain about your government. And who needs that? You’re much better of whining about how bad things are without wasting your time trying to make a difference.

No, just let me handle everything.

Trust me. The fewer of you who vote, the better off I’ll we’ll be.